someone, tell me that i'm selfish.

i realised i'm like super self-centered larh. =/

all i knew was looking at it one-sided and being all jealous.
gah! D:

i really freaking dunno what i'm trying to do nowadays.

why is it like this?
like really,
somehow, part of my heart wants exams to be continued.
like till forever, even if it's not possible.

oh well, i own the lala land.

hahas.

but really larh..
exams ended..
things getting back to the headache ones..
seriously sick of it.

i know i suck, but i did try.
but i really wanna giv up alr.

what a big fat liar.
here i'm giving up, yet i kept telling others to keep trying.
really really sick of it.

like, you work hard also last.
dun work hard also last.
everyone will always see you as "last".
so what's the point?

in their mindset, "last = slacker".
like really larh.
i dun give a fk.
last jiu last.
like i've never thrown enough face.

only reason why i never gave up till now
is cos i dun wanna waste the efforts of those pple who tried helping me..

physics - 10 passes out of 45.
a maths - 3/3 only had 3 passes. [no hope for me alr]
HCL - i alr failed paper one, so overall's a CONFIRM FAIL.

only thing i'm happy about right now,
e maths - i improved A LOT. B3/A2 i think.
chem - expected D7/E8/F9, but passed! :DD c5 i think.
eng - totally unexpected to pass to nicely. xD

i've totally no idea what i'm trying to do or doing now.

only thing i can do now is to smile and say i'm fine.
(:

rained @ 8:14 PM